By Sybil Cummin, MA, LPC, ACS

Understanding the Consequences and How to Support Your Children
 
In families with a narcissistic parent, children often face unique challenges that can have lasting effects on their sense of self, relationships, and overall well-being. If you share children with your narcissistic ex-partner, it is likely that you have seen your children treated differently.

​One of the most prominent dynamics in these families is the designation of the “golden child” and the “scapegoat.”
 
Understanding the function of these roles for the narcissist and their consequences is crucial for protective parents who want to support their children and mitigate the harm caused by the narcissistic parent.

Maintaining a meaningful connection with your child when stuck in a “high-conflict” co-parenting situation can be a daunting task, especially if they spend more time with your ex-partner. Strategies will be different depending on the age of your child, so in this article we’re going to share strategies specifically for older kids that can help bridge the emotional gap and foster a sense of connection despite the circumstances. If you believe that there is a strong likelihood that your child is being indoctrinated to believe lies about you, these strategies can help but likely will not be enough to completely challenge that level of conditioning. Stay tuned for future articles where we will go into more detail on these cases.
​Understanding the Dynamics

Navigating the complexities of maintaining a connection with your child when they spend more time with your ex-partner means taking a look at various factors. The age and development of the child, your pre-existing relationship, and their feelings toward the living situation all play a crucial role. The strategies in this article are tailored for older kids, with the understanding that these can be adapted for younger children.